Re-westernization

Today is a landmark! Loz and I purchased a bag of pasta, a jar of sauce, a block of cheese and some reduced price salad leaves, and made ourselves a gormet meal for the first time in 2 months! It's amazing how good it feels to be able to read the packaging, and not to be on red alert every time you open a packet of something, just in case the food is looking at you, or tries to jump out! Yes, New Zealand feels gastronomically safe, and is going down rather well so far. In fact, I love it! That sweeping statement is based on 2 days sleeping in a hostel, and one bus journey. But still, it's true.



We arrived in Auckland after an 11 hour flight (who knew that there was that much world between Hong Kong and New Zealand?! It's like flying to Japan. AGAIN.) Anyway, we arrived at 7.25 am. Auckland is 5 hours ahead of Hong Kong, so we were messed up before we started, having landed around the time we were used to going to bed, and it only being first thing in the morning. Also, we couldn't check into the hostel until 1pm, so I had a nap in Starbucks (New Zealand smells and tastes a little weird, I think it's the dairy) and Loz went to check out the nearby gift shops. As soon as the opportunity presented itself, I went to bed... woke up for tea, and then went back to bed again.

 

The next day Loz optimistically set her alarm for 9am. I made it up at 10, Loz slept til around 1. We were going to go up the tower in Auckland, but we ended up planning our whole week in NZ instead. It took a lot of doing! We had planned to hire a car, until we discovered we could do it cheaper by bus! We'd planned to go to Cape Reinga (I keep saying it wrong, it's Ree-ing-ga), which is the most northern point in New Zealand, and were going to get a tour from a place called Hokianga Harbour. Seen as we weren't driving though, this kind of threw a spanner in the works, as we couldn't get there, so we skipped the harbour and booked a bus to a place called Paihia (pie here). This is where I googled 'things to do in Paihia', and found far too many exciting and expensive things for us to do. We booked 'swimming with dolphins' and our day to Cape Reinga, then I got distracted by a tour to Hobbiton in the town of Matamata (matter matter), so we booked a bus there, then decided on Waiotapu (why otter poo) for it's 'thermal wonderland', Rotorua and Lake Taupo, with a bus back to Auckland to catch our flight. We were a combination of fed up of planning, and desperately excited by the time we'd finished writing all our reservation numbers out at about 1am. We got practically no sleep before heading out on the bus to Paihia the following day.

Paihia is cute. It's a pretty little seaside town, full of gorgeous shops, which in turn are full of gorgeous arty things, all of which we would like to take home.  My favourite is www.flyingfishdesign.co.nz - they do mail order, in case anyone is feeling generous :D. We chilled out for a little while at the hostel, then went for a wander on the beach as the sun went down.

Skip to 24 hours later, and we've not long returned, knackered and sand filled from our Cape Reinga tour (Ree-ing-ga, Ree-ing-ga, Ree-ing-ga). We've had a fantastic day and it's only fermenting my love for New Zealand.When I woke up this morning at 6:15am my heart sank. The sound of pissing rain was all I could hear, and I was seriously concerned that the weather was about to screw us once again. It dried up for a little while as we waited for the bus, which was uncharacteristically considerate, however it wasn't long before it was raining heavily again. We went to a forest of kauri trees (koh-ree) first. The trees are 700-1000 years old (which is quite young for kauri by all accounts) and consequently they are huge! They are the material of choice for Maori carvings, and one of the places we stopped had some incredible furniture, inlcuding a hollowed out tree trunk, turned into a spiral staircase. Unfortunately it costs 10s of thousands of pounds, else I'd have bought you all a lovely table.

 We stopped a couple of times on the way up the east coast before we got onto 'the tail of the fish' (the north part of New Zealand), and up to the very tip: Cape Reinga. The scenery is stunning, but of course it was foggy. Luckily as we got closer, the mist cleared and we could see everything: the lighthouse; where the pacific ocean joins the Tasman sea, the bays and the pure white sand at the bottom of the lush green forests. Beautiful.

The Maori believe Cape Reinga is the parting place for spirits when you die. The north island is a fish (a big fish caught by a boy called Maori - the top is its tail) the south island is an upturned canoe (when he caught the fish it was so big and beautiful he wanted to let it go, however his brothers hacked away at its flesh for food, so Maori tied a sea-going canoe to the fish to help it float) and the tiny island at the bottom (I think it's Stephenson Island or something like that), is the anchor used to lodge said canoe. Anyway, when you die your spirit goes to Cape Reinga to walk into the ocean back to the homeland. People plant trees in memory of people here to help reforest the island. Loz and I did our bit, and can watch them grow on google earth - my tree is at S34.43054, E172.68190, if you want to see it! It's the bushy one - Loz's is next door, the leafy green one. If you're visiting Cape Reinga at any point, please check up on it, and give it some water.




We only made a short stop, so by the time we'd planted our tree, we legged it down to the lighthouse, then had to power walk back up the hill. Luckily we were on time, and weren't last - the old lady and her daughter were quite late... poor woman, running that hill was pretty hardcore! When we got back on the bus we headed to the sand dunes for some boogie boarding!

The safety demonstration scared me so much that I almost didn't bother. Very graphic descriptions of what happens if you let go of the board... broken fingers, then wrist, then arm, then dislocated shoulders... plus choking on sand, and various other things, as you might expect travelling on your front with your arms out down a hill at 30mph. Loz was ahead of me in the queue, and I watched as she whizzed past me on her board. Despite having been made to repeat 'I will not let go of the board' several times, guess what?! There was a gasp of horror from the group as she flew over the top of the board and tuck-rolled into a big sandy puddle. She got up and shouted 'I'm ok', which was good, because it was funny! When I made it to the bottom, Loz looked like someone had been sick very violently down her front. She was a big spoilsport and wouldn't let me take a picture though.

 After the sandboarding we took a drive down 90 mile beach, driving through the waves at points, and making the occasional zig zag to stop us sinking. We stopped on the beach for quite a while and had a paddle. Some of the waves were quite big, so I was waist deep at times. The tide was really powerful, and sucked you out to sea if you didn't stand firm. The sand was full of oysters - the coach guide must make a fortune, as he was collecting them by the bucket load - he does the same tour every day, so I guess he must collect hundreds! He got a little distracted by the oysters, and as we were heading to the coach, one of the waves swept right under the bus. He had to run and shift it quick, before it got stuck in the sand. We headed back, and made ourselves another gormet pasta dish before heading to bed.

 On waking the next morning, I was so excited. This was one of the days I was most looking forward to: swimming with the dolphins. We got on the boat at 8.30am, and sat on the top deck enjoying the views of the Bay of Islands. The Bay of Islands, so named by Captain Cook, has 144 islands, some big, some small, but I'd gladly live on any of them. We picked some passengers up at Russell, and then stopped in the bay for a brief safety demonstration. It was explained that as dolphins are wild, there is no way sightings can be guaranteed. They don't live in the bay, however the bottlenosed dolphins come in to feed, and the common dolphins can be found further out to sea. The plan was to search for bottlenoses in the bay, as these are friendly and enjoy swimming with people (they think we're toys). They're about 3m long, compared to the common dolphins (I'm sure they're lovely, and very well mannered), who are only about 2m long, and are not fans of human swimming cos we're much bigger then them. It was also explained that we couldn't be guaranteed to swim with any dolphins, as if the sea was rough it's too difficult to get us back on the boat, and also if the dolphins have babies with them, it's illegal to swim with the pod in New Zealand. They said sometimes it would take an hour to find some, sometimes 2, sometimes 3 or 4 and sometimes they wouldn't find any at all, in which case we would be issued with a lifetime voucher to come back until we did see some. The lady also said they'd had 2 brilliant swims the day before, and so she was fairly confident.

So. Four hours later, after scouring the north east coast of New Zealand, and spotting nothing but sholes of sea trout, and the odd gannet, we were a little concerned. It was very windy and cold (we'd also just figured out we're paid £1.50 for a crunchie - jesus!?!) and we were feeling a little low. Our bus was due to leave Paihia for Auckland at 3pm, so there was no way we'd be able to use our voucher this trip. Our whole time in New Zealand was carefully planned and booked, and the bus tickets were non-refundable, because they're much cheaper that way. We do like cheap.

I asked after we'd been issued with our vouchers, the likelyhood of seeing any dolphins in the afternoon, and they said it was possible, although it was probably better to try the day after. Great. Loz and I had a chat, and I really wanted to change the bus ticket if we could possibly afford it. We got off the boat, which is conveniently where all of Paihia's tourist information offices, tour company offices etc etc are, it's also where all the busses and boats go from (New Zealand is incredibly organised for tourists - it all links perfectly! More on the virtues of NZ later...) Anyway, we found the Intercity bus counter, which was unmanned. We asked at another desk, and a lady called a guy named Graham over to help, who clearly wasn't happy about this. Now, Graham gets a special mention in our blog, for being one of the few, rude and useless people we've met along the way. We had half an hour to get in touch with the bus company, the hostel and rebook the afternoon's cruise, but we had no reference or phone numbers with us. We asked the lovely Graham if there was a later bus going to Auckland that night. There was, 7.10pm. Excellent. We then asked if we could change our reservation, and how much this would cost. He grumpily looked us up on the computer, as we didn't have the details on us, and said it would cost $106 between us to change the ticket which was £53 ish, but we should call the bus company and see if they might let us change.

We had no phone, no number. Graham clearly wasn't going to do it. 'Erm do you have a phone number for them please?'


Tutting, he found us a phone number. 'Do you know if there's a phone somewhere that we could use?' He pointed out of the door on his right, without speaking. 'Erm, do you still have our reservation number so we can quote it to the people on the phone?'


'Not now, because I didn't know I needed it!'


Well Graham, you are the height of customer service. Intercity must be proud of you.

 When I'd finally scrawled the numbers on my hand (paper was one step too far for Graham) we headed out of the door on our right and saw another little hut. We went in.


'Hi! We're looking for a phone, is there one in here we could use please?'


'What kind of phone?'


'Erm, a payphone - the guy from Intercity said we'd find one in here'


'Oh did he now? Who are you calling?'


We explained, and the lovely lady handed their company phone over. We called the company. It was a fax number. Thanks Graham!


'Alright?' asked the lady.


'No, it's a fax number, we'll have to go back next door and get the right one.'


'Hang on' she said, dialling the phone. The tone was priceless:


'I have the two girls you sent over here, you've given them a fax number, do you want to give them a phone number?' She smiled at us. 'There you go girls. It's a freephone number so take as long as you like.'



We got hold of the bus company who managed to get us student tickets for an extra £5 each. Perfect! While I paid, Loz ran to rebook the dolphins. Then we realised we didn't have the hostel number either. Another lovely lady in the same office googled and called them for us. Again, we're really grateful to the two women in the tourist office, because it really wasn't their problem, as we weren't even their customers. They went out of their way to help us anyway. Unlike some. Graham.

So! We were back on the boat heading out to Russell to pick more people up for the second time that day. We pulled up again for a safety briefing, then the phone went. Unfortunately another boat had broken down, so we had to go and take some of its passengers back to Paihia. Then, it turned out, our 'dolphin cruise' had suddenly become a 'combination cruise', so whilst looking for the dolphins we were picking up another 50 people, and visiting various parts of the bay as well. We thought that this would scupper our dolphin hunting chances significantly, as we'd already lost an hour, and now there was more to cram into less time.

Two hours in and there was no sign of any dolphins. We'd been around the bay again (this time in a little more depth, with an added bit of historical information), we'd been out to sea again, we'd made it up to 'the hole in the rock' again, and even gone through it this time. Still no dolphins. We headed back to an island - the one where Swiss Family Robinson lived (before they got murdered by an angry tribesman - that wasn't in the cartoon), to drop some people off. It was now around 3.30. Even though they'd extended our trip time until 5.30, given we'd already spent 7 hours that day looking, as had about 4 other boats, it wasn't looking hopeful.

Just then, the announcement came over the radio. A couple of dolphins had been spotted on the other side of the bay. We were very excited! The crew practically threw the other passengers off the boat, and sped off towards the dolphins.

It wasn't too long before we spotted them. Well, actually, there were several minutes of people 'oohing' and 'ahhing' before I could figure out where they were looking, but then I saw them too. Two dolphins playing around the boat. Apparently the boats are like new toys - every time another one comes along, they go and play with it. Just as we had distracted them from one boat, yet another boat joined us to transfer some passengers (those who were unfortunate enough to have to be back by the original time of 4.30. This included one poor German girl, who was on her fourth attempt at dolphin swimming!) After they'd been despatched, we got called down for a swim-safety briefing, handed a snorkel and some flippers and told to jump. The crew screamed 'swim!', and we all took off army-style after the dolphins. All except me that is, who had managed to lose one of my swimming costume straps. I had a difficult decision - swim and flash, or drown with dignity. I went for swimming, although it wasn't long before we were called back to the boat, as the dolphins had buggered off. Great. The problem I had now was, I need two arms to get back on the boat, and at least one arm to hold my swimming costume up.

Having in my usual graceful style made it back onto the boat, Loz helped me reform my costume into a halter neck, as we got ready to go in again. Alas, the dolphins were having none of it. They'd vanished - clearly not enjoying the floorshow. Oh well. We swam in the same sea as them - that counts right?!


So, safely back on dry land, and having at least seen some dolphins, we prepared to return to Auckland before heading off to Rotorua the next day for fun in The Shire. As Cat may have mentioned, tourism in New Zealand is incredibly well organised, and everything links up to make it easy for you to get from one attraction to another. Having changed our bus, we decided to grab our bags, and a very hasty tea, near the bus stop so we could see when it arrived. Dinner was a fantastic curry, which we only wish we'd had more time to enjoy.


One of the other things about the busses in New Zealand is that the drivers are all crazy. The first one we had threw an absolute hissy fit about people touching the air-conditioning vents on 'his' coach. I'm not sure I've ever experienced dictatorship quite like it:



DON'T TOUCH THE VENTS! DO NOT TOUCH THE VENTS! (Aimed at some poor person who just tried to adjust them). AS SOON AS YOU DO I WILL KNOW! YOU WILL EITHER FREEZE OR COOK THE PEOPLE AT THE FRONT AND THE BACK! YOU DO NOT TOUCH THE VENTS!

We didn't touch the vents. I have to say this guy, apart from his vent touching issues was actually quite nice, and reminded me a bit of Alf from Home and Away.


Not to be outdone, our next bus driver (who looked a bit like Santa, or Colonel Sanders) was practically having an aneurism over the fact he'd not been given his usual sleek and stream lined coach, but something old and rusty, slightly resembling the cheese wagon-style American school bus (thankfully minus the garish yellow), with a little tow trailer for luggage. We knew we had the right bus because in New Zealand, they have a list of passenger names, and are expecting you, and check you in like you're on a school trip. There were only four of us, and we settled in for the first leg of the journey. Cat got into trouble for asking to get her laptop out of her big bag in the trailer. Santa wasn't happy. No presents for Catherine this year.



We made it to... I don't know where, where we were unceremoniously dumped on the side of the road to wait for the next bus to Auckland. Imagine our joy when 'vent man' turned up. We were told to wait outside, as the bus wasn't ready, and had a little giggle doing our best 'DON'T TOUCH THE VENTS' impressions. At this point, one of the girls we'd met on the boat said she'd had the same experience as us, and joined in. Quite fun really. Oh, while I remember, she'd also been shut in the door of the old bus by santa for trying to ask if we were at the right stop. Tut tut! No present for Maria either. I don't think Loz was quite watching what went on with the door, as she wasn't in as good a position as me. What actually happened, was the girl, who is Brazillian, asked if this was the right stop to change for Auckland. The Colonel ignored her, and said 'watch out for that door, it might close on you', she did not understand him. She repeated herself. He repeated himself, and then pressed the close button on the door. I don't think he can be santa.

At this point we also got chatting to Maria, who had majored in journalism before she went travelling, and had been working for a magazine. We asked her what type of journalism she wanted to do, and then tried to hide the amused looks on our faces when she came out with, 'what I really want to do is work for playboy.' I think we may not have been successful, as she followed that with, 'In Brazil playboy is actually very informative, with lots of interesting articles and stories' ... presumably about breasts.


Finally the bus was ready. It turned out vent-man had closed off half of the bus, and we were only allowed to sit in the front four rows. What did he think we were going to do? Throw a party? Crumble crisps on his precious floor, spray sprite on his ceiling... touch the vents?! Obviously we would not be eating or drinking on the coach. They say power does funny things to people... but really?!


We eventually made it to Auckland & then headed off to Rotorua to go on a tour of Hobbiton, which is The Shire movie set from the Lord of the Rings (& apparently also the up-coming Hobbit) movies. Never having realised quite how big a LOTR fan Cat is (she'd been singing/whistling/humming the soundtrack at me for days), I got quite caught up in the excitement of it all & was really looking forward to it by the time we got there. The lovely driver Ben picked us up at the bus station & as we were the only two going from there he took us to our hostel first to check in & leave our bags. So nice. We then left for Matamata, which is basically the town nearest to the farm where the set is, & were dropped off at The Shire's Rest Cafe at the edge of the 'tourist farm'. Here, we were bundled into a minibus with the other tourists & set off into the farm, which is still a proper working sheep farm, just with hobbits too. (One of the girls on the tour was even sort of dressed as a hobbit... sort of... a bit... well she said she was... but not really...)

Having a dad who works in TV means you grow up very aware that it is all actually fake but still find the whole idea very exciting at the same time (or maybe that's just me). Carolyn, our tour guide, was very knowledgeable & quite fun as she showed us round what is essentially now a field with a few bits of manky plywood which are the front of hobbit houses (there are no actual houses behind them except for one...). We did also get to see the Party Tree & the Party Field and the Lake too though so mustn't complain. The most exciting part of the tour for me (& I think for Cat also,) was getting to visit & stand inside Bag End (Bilbo's house). This is the only one that has anything behind the wall facade, though it's just a square room & was apparently made only for the camera to go in to film the back of Gandalf & Bilbo's heads through the doorway. Of course we joined everyone in having our pictures taken with our heads poking out of the windows. After the set tour, we were taken back to the Shire's Rest & got to watch a sheep having it's first shearing & (yay) feed something lambs with huge baby bottles. They were unbelievably cute! We got a surprise after that in the shape of a complimentary cup of tea, quiche, apple & a (delicious) homemade raspberry & chocolate chip muffin before we were taken home & dropped at the hostel. (I'd like to add at this point that we did want to buy you all some of the special LOTR 'SobeRing' 1% beer brewed especially for the LOTR so the actors could have 'real beer' in the scenes but not get too drunk to act, but we'd never have got it home. Also, Michael, Cat really did want to buy you the staff of Saruman/Gandalf (can't remember which) and the mask of Sauron but we really didn't have a spare million dollars. Sorry!)

After Rotorua we went to the Waiotapu Thermal Park & saw the Lady Knox Geyser (having heard both 'guyzer' & 'geezer' as pronounciations, we were educated by the man who came to set the geyser off, that in Kiwi Land (sounds like a fruit based theme park) it's pronounced 'guyzer'). We have to mention two lovely people we met here called Sue & Steve. Having caught the bus to near the park & very kindly been allowed to leave our big backpacks at the local cafe/petrol station bit on the main road, we walked the 2km to the park, and were then told we couldn't walk from the visitor centre to the geyser (which goes off only once a day at a set time so we had to be quick) and would have to beg for a lift off a fellow visitor. Neither of us was at all thrilled by this prospect & were amazed & relieved & very, very grateful when a lovely English lady called Sue (who was behind us in the queue & had overheard all this) immediately offered us a ride. Not only did her & Steve take us to the geyser, then back to the visitor centre to do the walk (which was amazing - the earth really is incredible & very beautiful & a bit crazy), they also offered us a lift down to Lake Taupo where they were headed that afternoon, which meant we weren't stranded for the entire day waiting for the bus. Once again, we'd been lucky enough to meet some incredibly nice people & are truly grateful to them for taking us under their wing.

Lake Taupo is one of the most beautiful places I have ever seen in my life. It's a huge expanse of water bordered by mountains & tiny beaches & a little yacht club where the locals sail & race. I loved it. They also have a stunning waterfall called the Huka Falls which I walked up to one day & sat by for a while. I think I can safely say that New Zealand as a whole is probably the most beautiful place I have ever been & both Cat & I are gutted we didn't get to go to the South Island, & we wish we'd spent more time there. We're already planning to go back & if you learn nothing else from our blog let it be that you should spend time on both parts of New Zealand, cos we really do feel we missed out. We headed back to Auckland with heavy hearts to get ready to fly off to Australia & hoping it would live up to our expectations. (I should add that the bus driver on the way back, was another mentalton, throwing everyone's bags on and off the bus as hard as he could. He was Scottish this time, and practically swallowed the microphone when talking, making his announcements almost impossible to decipher. He also told bad jokes. Must be a Scottish thing.) Deciding to do some last minute souvenir shopping on our way to check out the harbour, we were accosted by the shop-keeper who repeatedly shouted 'open, open, open' at us when we tried to get through the (open) door (which also had an 'open, please come in' sign on it too). Once this was combined with much 'go away' style arm waving & shaking of the head we deduced she actually meant 'closed'. Oh silly us, how did we not realise 'open' meant 'closed' on this little patch of land. Ah well, last minute shopping at the airport then. We went home to pack for another early flight & hoped that Australia would be as good as the awesome land of the Kiwis.

Thwarted in Hong Kong (& visiting friends)

So we landed in Hong Kong (sorry - instantly distracted by Cat stealing my Hokey Pokey - weird New Zealand 'crunchie' style thing)  (I hasten to add that Loz doesn't actually like hokey pokey, which is while I am 'stealing' it) and we set about trying to find our hostel to collapse in after our 3.15am start.  The hostel was quite cute with little chest of drawer stairs up to the top bunk, and bright primary colours on the walls.  It was however, also very damp.  'The wetness' as Cat calls it, was caused by the fact that being primarily quite a warm place, Hong Kong buildings are not really prepared for the apparently annual brief cold and misty spell that typically falls over Chinese New Year (they didn't mention that in the brochure) and creates much condensation on the inside of the windows.  Other than this and a funny smell (according to Cat) it was quite nice.  Having gotten marginally lost on the way and climbed a very steep hill, only to find out we didn't need to at all, we were relieved to finally make it, and gratefully collapsed for a rest.  We met a lovely girl called Dini from Singapore, who showed us round one of the markets and came for dinner with us.  It was at this point we decided to go and see a movie - Percy Jackson and the lightning thief - occasional crap acting and weak plot, but it was ok (and yet oddly I fell asleep in Avatar, and not this, despite the only showing we could get tickets for being at midnight).

Following the early start and late night, we were a bit lazy the next day.  We went for lunch with Dini, then on the old Star Ferry across to see the 'Symphony of Lights'.  I will say at this point, that perhaps our expectations were a tad high.  It is billed as a 'must see', but to be honest we were a bit disappointed.  (I, having felt rough all day, and dragged myself out to see this spectacle especially, was very disappointed, and a little grumpy - it did suck.) 

The first of two not so good things then happened.  Firstly, Cat lost her octopus card (oyster for you Londoners).  The card cost $150 (about £13-14).  She had only spent about $6, so we spent ages walking around looking for it, but to no avail.  (We were super pleased about looking for it for ages, as we'd also spent at least 45 mins looking for Pizza Hut... I will add that this was only because everywhere else was either selling head, tail or innards, or was wayyyyy out of our price range.  It wasn't very far away, but the map was ridiculous.  It just outright lied about where it was - anyway, that said, we got there eventually, and ate the crappest Pizza Hut ever, with the crappest service ever oh and seen as we were so miserable, we treated ourselves to the worlds worst cheesecake - which came still frozen.  So, needless to say, I was feeling rubbish, and p'ed off, THEN I lost my octopus card, so not only had I wasted $150, I now had to pay another $150 to travel round Hong Kong for the rest of the week!  Yay!)  The second thing as I was going to say before I was rudely interrupted, was that Cat wasn't very well either.  She had a nasty cold, which was only exacerbated by the damp (sorry, the wetness).  Cat decided that what she needed was a day of rest before the parade fun (It was worse than a cold- I felt a bit fluey too, although we don't say that out loud, because I'll be instantly quarantined) so we stayed in and chilled out before heading to the New Year parade, with high hopes and happy spirits, 3 and a half hours early to ensure we got a good spot (another event which we were very excited about.  A parade, Chinese New Year, Hong Kong... how can it possibly be bad?!) 

5 hours later when the parade finally finished, we sort of wished we hadn't bothered.  We'd had five hours of being shoved, pushed, prodded, poked, and groped by random (some of them smelly and weird) Chinese people. (The good news we discovered, was that all of mainland China heads to Hong Kong for the holidays - well, that was their cover anyway.  I still maintain they were sent by the government to stare at us and make us generally uncomfortable.)  Incidentally, we've noticed that they all do the peace sign in photographs.  We've figured that they have them taken in front of us, so they can give us the 2 finger salute at the same time.  When will we learn to stay home when things don't seem to be going well.

The next day Cat was still ill (I blame the little sod in Singapore).  She was also in the process of applying for a job, so I ventured out on my own to visit the famous Goldfish Market (closed for Chinese New Year), and Hong Kong park (it rained).  We did see the new year fireworks that night (they apparently drive the demons away) and once we'd moved for a better view, having stood completely in the wrong place, they were actually really good.  Apparently there was one shaped like a tiger... we only saw its ear!  Tres amusant.

I am glad to say that things did pick up after this, and Hong Kong had grown on us by the end of the week (the mould on the wall above my bunk in particular, had made startling progress.)   The next day we met up with an old friend of my dad's from when he was about 16.  Davie and Irene took us for coffee, to the gas lamps, mid-level escalators, dinner, and the amazing Russian vodka ice-bar, where you get a big Narnia-style fur coat to wear in the freezer, while you have your vodka shot.  We had an amazing night, and were excited about meeting up with them again later in the week. 


Cat was still ill the next day (yes. yawn. I was sick of it too.) so I headed out on my own, very excited at the prospect of going on the cable cars (which Cat doesn't like anyway so I wasn't being mean leaving her at home to miss it) at Lantau Island, and visiting the big buddha (or big bugga, as Cat keeps accidentally calling him - not sure he'll like that).  They were closed due to bad weather.  Never mind, after Fuji we've come to expect nothing but bad luck with the weather.  We went to the Temple street market that night, had dinner with Irene and bought lots of presents, and far too many handbags etc.  In particular I look forward to the bumblebee outfit I bought my dog Alf arriving home, so mum can send some pictures for us to post.  Spectacular - wings, antennae, the works - love it! 


One of the must-do things in Hong Kong (we of course take this phrase with a pinch of salt these days) is a visit to The Peak.  The Peak is reached by a tram ride up a hill, which puts you at a 45 degree angle, making the buildings look sideways.  In reality this meant for us, 2 hours of queuing (being poked and prodded by Chinese people again) and finally making it to the top of The Peak, only to discover there was so much fog we coudn't see anything (Mt Fuji, I hear you say).  Thankfully a very kind member of staff took pity on us when we showed her our blank photos, and let us up again when the fog had cleared a bit, so we actually saw something.  Hurrah!  Success!  Then we had to queue again to get back down.

 Cat was off to Macau to give her masterclass (which I'll let her tell you about), so I chilled out for the day and headed out to meet Irene for drinks at a gig Davie was doing.  It was ace!  Posh club, and great music, what more do you need?


Later we met Cat and went to a club called The Wanch, where we had a bit of a boogie to the band playing, and generally had a fab time.  (I sense a little glossing here Miss Hogg.)


In the meantime, I met my friend Tim who for those of you who haven't met him, went to Guildhall, but is actually from Macao, and now lives in Hong Kong.  We got the ferry across to Macao, which takes about an hour and then grabbed some lunch (which was lovely, and included no heads or tails), and then headed off to the masterclass.  Doing a masterclass is not something I have a massive amount of experience in - obviously, having seen and been in quite a few, I understand the concept, however having not played the saxophone for several months, not being in possession of a saxophone, and having discovered the night before, that I had dyed my only vaguely smart top orange with irremovable elephant dirt (it had been green), I wasn't really feeling ready for my first attempt.  It went very well though, and I enjoyed it, and they were polite enough to say they did too. 


After I'd finished sneezing on them, Tim and I headed out to a hotel for a coffee - my god it was posh, and then we had a quick look around a casino (or it would have been, if we could have found the entrance Tim left his sax at... that took us about half an hour in itself)  and went for some tea.  Tea was portuguese food, and was very yummy!  Then we headed back over to the mainland.

By the time I met up with Loz, she was on her 5th drink of the evening and having not been drinking since we've been away (again due to being skint, as opposed to being angels), she was claiming to be a little tipsy.  I didn't believe her - she looked fine (I think she believed me fairly soon though).  We had several more drinks, and did some dancing, then about 2am we headed for a taxi.  Loz was struck by an uncharacteristic and unusual wave of travel sickness on the way home, which brought about some loss of limb-control, but it was ok, as one of the symptoms was also giggling so at least she was happy.  It was a long taxi ride, and the effects lasted well into the next day, which was spent recouperating.

I hasten to add here that Catherine also spent the whole of the next day recovering too.  Not from her 'flu' as she'll probably try to complain but from the drinks she consumed as well.  Irene also apparently spent the day recouperating.  No more drinking for us then.  (I suspect I would not have been feeling so bad if I didn't have the flu.)

So, the next day was devoted to recouperation (yes, Cat as well) (although I didn't really need it), until Cat headed off to meet her friend Danielle for dinner.  They also went to the Avenue of Stars where I think they recognised about 2 of the people.  Nevermind, she got to touch Jackie Chan's hands so she was happy.  I went for dinner with Davie and Irene again (they really did look after us a lot.  Thank you!!)  Sunday meant time to fly, and with 11 hours ahead to fill we just kept thinking of New Zealand, and that it would hopefully all be worth it in the end.

PS. Cat did actually get her job application sent in, so fingers crossed!

Thailand: The land of smiles :D

KL, Bali and Singapore were all very toasty, but Bangkok took the biscuit.  34-36 every day, 70-80% humidity, and no rain! 


We had been looking forward to Bangkok, largely due to the accommodation.  We'd managed to find a hostel, which basically was a big building full of small flats - we got ourselves a studio, which had a fridge, a microwave, sofa, tv, use of the pool, fitness centre and tennis courts, but more importantly at this point, washing machines.  Everything we own was dirty when we arrived, so the first thing we did (after a plate of chicken fried rice from the restaurant - 80p, very reasonable) was do some washing.  We got downstairs at 8.50pm, only to find that the bit with the machines closed at 9pm.  Boo. 

 We spent the first morning washing and attempting to dry enough things to go out in in the afternoon (we needn't have bothered really, cos as soon as we went outside in it, it would've dred instantly anyway) then we decided to grab a taxi to the Grand Palace.  The palace is my lasting impression of Thailand from last time, it's incredible - the most decorated building I've ever seen.  There isn't a single centimetre that doesn't sparkle with gold, or coloured glass, or have hand-painted flowers or bells on.  I've never seen anything like it.  All of the temples I've seen in Thailand are incredibly beautiful - even the less touristy ones you pass on the road, but the palace is a whole other level.  We wondered around, in the blistering heat (not literally this time at least, thanks to the upgrade to factor 50), for an hour or so, and then got a tuk tuk to the sleeping Buddha.

Tuk tuks are another reason why I love Thailand.  They're hillarious.  I can't believe they are actually government licensed taxis, cos they're crazy.   Bashed up metal carriages with no sides, joined to the back of a motorbike.  They look like one of those 3-wheeled, red and yellow early learning centre cars that small children have - the ones that you sit in and push yourself along... only with an engine.  They tear around bangkok at god knows what miles an hour (I'm sure it sounds faster than it is, cos the engines make a lot of noise), and you pay whatever you manage to negotiate with the driver... which is basically what Thai people would pay, plus at least 150% for good measure.  You also have to be very specific that you don't wish to be taken to any sort of Rolex shop or ping pong show before you go to your destination, as they all seem to be on commission from one or the other. 

We were quite fortunate this time with taxis I will say.  Last time I came to Bangkok they tried to rip me off every single time I got a taxi.  I don't know whether it was cos I was on my own at the time, or whether I was just unlucky but they tried every trick in the book - meter rigging, extra surcharges, fixing the price blah blah.  Thankfully this time, we were really lucky- particularly with the guys who took us too and from the airport, as last time one guy tried to charge me 3 times the amount! 

(Quick tip...If you ever get a taxi from Bangkok airport - don't give them the bit of paper that the booking people give you, keep it - it's a complaint form.  If they try to take it off you, they're going to scam you.  They should put the meter on, it should start at 35 Baht, and it should tick up slowly 2 Baht at a time.  They should have a distance versus price table displayed in the car too so you can check.  They're not allowed to fix the price, they have to put the meter on from the airport, if they don't, get out.  They won't want you to complain cos they'll be in trouble, so they should change their mind before you get your luggage out of the boot!  Watch for big jumps in the meter too.)  They do scam you with a smile though, and in my experience if you call them on it, they back down.  Thailand is so cheap its very easy not to notice that you massively overpaid for something, because at home it would still be more expensive.

So where were we, tuk tuk round to the sleeping Buddha.  I'd seen photos of the sleeping Buddha, but you can't see in photos just how huge it is.  He's massive!  46m long by 15m high!  We grabbed a few pics, then headed out to another temple: Wat Arun. 

I think this was actually my favourite.  From a distance Wat Arun looks like it's a stone carved temple.  When you get close to it, it's actually white with loads of coloured flowers carved on and painted in different colours.  It sounds tacky, but the over all effect is really pretty.  There was also the added bonus of climbing up the sides - I'd seen monks do it on a postcard, but I'd assumed it was a 'monks only' thing.  Turns out it's not!  Yay!  The steps are seriously steep though.  I was also wearing a skirt, which wasn't a good choice of climbing attire, particularly on a windy day... hey the old Japanese guys loved it anyway.  They were too old to climb it themselves, so they took to taking photos of Loz climbing instead.  Haha! 

By the time we got to the top the sun was starting to go down a bit.  There was a nice breeze, and beautiful views of the gardens and the river.  Another place where they should consider a cocktail bar I think... not sure it's in-keeping with Buddhist tradition though.

Day two we took a bizarre day trip which we booked through the hostel to a place called Kanchanaburi province.  We saw the bridge over the river Kwai, and the war museum, as well as crazy things like an Aussie guy bottle feeding a leopard cub.  The original bridge over the river kwai built by the POWs is only a little stub now, but there is a new version, which turns out to be fully functioning.  Tourists trek up and down the brige for photos non-stop.  The bottom of it is basically a few metal plates bolted together with train tracks either side, then rotting wooden planks either side of that.  There's only enough room for one person at a time in the middle, so people walk on the wooden bits, a lot of which have big holes in, or just flip straight up when you stand on them.  We were not entirely sure it would pass health and safety in the UK... not that that's always a bad thing, and to be honest it wasn't the worst offender of the day! 

It turns out that despite the tourist traffic constantly on the train tracks, that the railway bridge still fully functions.  We were heading back to the bus when a whistle started blowing.  I heard Loz say, 'there's a train', to which I said 'no way' (or similar),

'I think it's gonna come on the bridge'
'There's no way they'd let it on the bridge, there's too many people'
'Cat, we've got to get off the bridge now, else we're going to be stuck and the bus will go'

A guy was holding a red flag in front of the train just before the start of the bridge.  It stopped.

'See, it must stop there.  I told you they wouldn't let it on the bridge, that would be ridiculous.'

We got off the bridge, and headed back towards the bus, just in time to see the train head over the bridge full of tourists, crowded down the sides.

'Jesus Christ.  Now that definitely wouldn't pass HnS'

We got back on the bus, and were taken to a railway station... apparently most people in our group were taking the 'Death Railway' back to where we'd just come from (yes that's what it's actually called, hmm, I wonder how it got it's name?)  We weren't, so we changed busses for the 3rd time that day, and headed to do some elephant riding in an open sided jeep. 

My previous elephant riding experience in Chiang Mai was amazing.  Really lush forest, torrential rain, walking through the river, feeding them bananas as we went.  This wasn't the same.  It was scorching hot, barren, there was nothing to see landscape wise, and nothing for the elephants to eat or explore on the way round.  I felt bad.  We bought them some bananas at the end, but I felt quite sorry for them as they didn't seem so happy as the other ones in Chiang Mai.  Not sure bananas made up for it.  The guy also tried to sell us something made out of elephant's teeth - 'for luck'.  I'm sure it was an old elephant, that died of old age after a long, happy and healthy life, or perhaps a baby one had a visit from the tooth fairy... or perhaps I am both ignorant and naiive.  

We headed for lunch, which was distinctly edible, and then went bamboo rafting.  It was at this point having been in the sun for too long that I started to feel horribly sick.  My water was warm in my bag, but I felt so sick I didn't feel like drinking it.  I needed some aircon. 

We headed up to a waterfall, where I sat with my head between my knees, desperate to jump in - and would have done had it not have been in direct sunlight.  I tried to go back to the van but the dozy woman forgot about us, and I had to sit and wait until it was time to leave.  Finally we got an airconned van instead of the truck, and I felt a little better as we headed out to the tiger temple. 

The tiger temple was one of those places which I wasn't sure ethically whether we should have been going or not.  Advertised as a sanctury for rescued tigers, but with some dubious reports that that may not be the case, we were only inside for about five mins before we figured that we probably shouldn't have gone in. 

It cost 500B for a start just to go in- about £10, which is very expensive for Thailand - most places cost us about 50B to get into. We were screamed at by the organiser, who marched us down the dirt track towards the tigers, telling us if we didn't hurry up they'd be going without us (charming).  The tigers were all lying on the floor, looking pretty out of it.  People where queuing for ages to pay another £20 for a photo with them.  We decided to give it a miss, and headed round the corner, where there was a less drugged-looking baby tiger having his photo taken and getting decidedly fed up of having small children sitting on his back.  Thinking it would be a step too far in terms of animal cruelty if we sat on him, Loz and I settled for a pat, and then wandered around to see a couple more tigers in the waterfall, and some bison... presumably bred for lunch purposes.  That was kind of it - no sign of a temple, although the monks 'looked after' the tigers, so perhaps that's where the name comes from... or perhaps we disliked the place too much to go and hunt for one.  I felt bad about going there actually - more so than the elephant place even.  All in all, not sure we had the best day ethically that day!

The following day we treated ourselves to a lie in, before heading out to the sky bar at about six to see the sunset.  Last year when we attempted to visit the skybar, we were inproperly dressed for the occasion, and wound up taking photos in the toilets, stealing some sanitary bags and heading home.  I was determined we would make it in this time.  We donned our poshest gear - which frankly is not very posh, and we even dug out the little make-up we have... which is basically a mascara and some eyeshadow, AND I got my perfume out so we didn't smell of elephant.  We really had made an effort, and it paid off... we got in! 

The hotel was very posh, and we had to take out more money to afford a cocktail (incidentally our first alcohol since the free saki in Japan).  Mine was a lovely strawberry coconut one with real strawberries, and Loz's was some sort of chocolate and malibu thing - both very tasty, and we enjoyed both them and the view of Bangkok from the 64th floor.  Nom nom.

After this, having not been market shopping yet (which has to be a criminal offence for Thailand), we headed to Pat Pong market... or Ping Pong market as I prefer, due to the amount of guys trying to sell you ping pong shows as you wonder round.  These have been highly recommended to me in the past, however we gave it a miss, and proceeded to blow the budget on presents. 

Having been allergic to the cheap watch I bought in Kuala Lumpur, I decided to find myself another... a DKNY don't you know.  They're so well made I couldn't possibly be allergic to one of those.  I also found an authentic Louis Vuitton wallet (new design, very good quality, she give me good priiiiiice), and some real pandora charms.  We did some particularly good bartering - Loz got some T-shirts, and some real thai silk scarves.  We did well... before we headed home skint.

The following day we'd planned to go to Ayutthaya (ancient capital of Thailand, which is now mostly ruined temples).  We were doing it on a budget of about 50p after the market shopping, and got the third class train with no aircon, and the dead chickens!   We were knee to knee, packed in with the local yokels, but when it's 60p (compared to first class which is five entire pounds) for over 2 hours on the train, one cannot complain!  I managed to sleep on the window sill, despite getting my hair attached to the outside of the train several times, and we arrived just after lunch. 

A tuk tuk driver started to try to sell us a tour as soon as we got off the train.  We had pretty much no money - although a lot of the temples were far apart so it would have been useful to take a tuk tuk tour.  In typical thai style the guy launched into his sales pitch 'maaany many tourists go with me, looky looky, read my book, how much you pay?'  We told him repeatedly we couldn't afford it but he was very insistent.  We got him down from 1600B to 300 - nothing improves your bartering skills like complete inability to pay any more.  He was also very nice - he said 'maybe I have friend, you go inside temple for free, maybe I not have friend, you see outside.'  Luckily his 'friends' were out in force today, and we got free entry into all of the temples... we're not entirely sure he knew them, and we have no idea what he said to them (probably told them we were special needs or something) but we didn't care.  We went to the giant gold buddha, one with a buddha head growing in a tree (looks a bit like grandmother willow from pocohontas), the giant sleeping buddha (which seemed even bigger than the last), and finally a Cambodian Angor-Wat style one, where we got to do some climbing again.  We were really pleased we went, and headed home happy where we took a dip in the pool and headed to bed for an early start in the morning.  Next stop Hong Kong!

A bit of a crap day in Singapore

I think we have topped Mt Fuji for the worst day so far.  We're currently damp and miserable in a doctor's surgery, in the world's worst shopping centre, waiting to get Loz's disgusting foot growth seen to.  It's probably just a blister, however, it looks more gross than any blister we've ever seen, and it's pussing everywhere.  (We're suffering so you have to... pictures to follow). 

We started the day all good intentioned, and were going to head to the nature reserve, Bukit Timah, but we were held up for various reasons, and didn't set off until about half 1.  Luckily, according to the guy in the hostel, only a half hour bus ride.  We got off the bus at about 3pm!  Half an hour my bottom. 

(ooooh it's number 8 in the queue, Loz is No.10... we're convinced the coughing child next to us who refuses to put his hand over his mouth has swine flu.)

When we got off the bus, it was raining torrentially - emergency poncho time!  We trekked off looking like a condom variety pack, and halfway there we met a woman who told us we'd be stupid to do the nature reserve in this weather as it was dangerous.  There are lots of muddy slopes, which become very slippery.( Srip srip.)  We headed to the visitor centre anyway, (other people were dressed as condoms too, so we felt better).  At this point Loz's plaster fell off her foot, and revealed  a new level of gross.

(oooh she's just gone in)

So we headed to the nearby shopping centre (which is a collection of employment agencies, dodgy massage parlours, and maid hiring services...in one of the maid hire places, there seem to be about 20 filipino girls in yellow t-shirts, all sat in silence in rows presumably just waiting to be hired.  You'd think they'd call them...).  I decided to pop to an internet cafe I'd seen outside - turns out it wasn't an internet cafe at all, it was an internet gaming centre.  The guy said I could use the internet, but the keyboard would have no letters on... I decided not to bother, and headed back just in time to get drenched, and am now freezing and damp in the aircon.  Hurrah.  It's our 1 month travel anniversary today - we were gonna celebrate and everything...

(Los has apparently been bitten, had an alergic reaction to it, and now it's infected.  Triple whammy!  She's just getting some (hopefully inexpensive) cream, and then we can go back and sulk in the room for the rest of the day. 

Skip on a day, and I'm certainly feeling a little better.  Loz's cream was quite expensive, and blew the budget, so we thought we might as well go the whole hog (no pun intended) and went out for a lovely dinner on the river last night to try and salvage the day.  We were both shattered so we had a bit of a lazy day today, as we're moving again tomorrow.

Before all that lot, we did have a nice day in Singapore.  I quite like it, and I can see the attraction to move here.  It's clean, and the nightlife looks great it's hotter than the UK, and it's English speaking.  We went on a cruise down the river, which was nice, but I think in doing that we saw most of what we wanted to see.  I don't think as a tourist there's a huge amount to do that's particularly unique to Singapore - that's the impression we've been left with anyway.  It's kind of more just being here.  There's some good shopping - both malls, and market shopping, and it's quite pretty, but it's not hitting the favourite list so far I don't think.  We've got a couple of lovely room mates... we were beginning to think China was sending unfriendly people round after us to spite us because we didn't like Beijing... but we now have a Japanese and a German girl as well who are both really nice!

I can't wait for Bangkok tomorrow!

Feel the burn.

So it’s been a fairly quiet week in Bali in the end. It was definitely lucky we were in such a nice hotel as after the lobsterfication incident we did have to spend the next few days hiding in the room recouperating. Many bottles of moisturiser later we are on the way to recovery. We have just arrived at the hotel we stay in tonight near the airport (or so we thought, turns out it’s about the same distance away as where we were so it was a completely pointless move – never mind, it seems nice but calling themselves an airport hotel is a bit of a lie. It turns out that ‘Denpasar airport’ is about as accurate as Ryanair’s description of Vienna airport which is actually in Bratislava – a whole other country). We thought we’d just update you quickly with some of the funnier moments of the week, since apart from a trip to the shopping centre, a trip to the beach and a few more trips to our swimming pool, we haven’t been up to much due to the burns.


 Firstly, silly shop names we’ve spotted include 'Wank Internet', 'The Athlete’s Foot', 'Jerk Wardrobe', 'Semen Triple', 'Seafood Cak' and 'Sinus Refill Centre'. Needless to say we didn’t feel the urge to visit any of them.


We’ve also had some funny food incidents including potato skins, which ironically enough had no skin anywhere in or on them, potato wedges which were shaped like cubes, prawn spring rolls which were actually just crispy breaded whole prawns and fried noodles which turned out to be noodle soup.


The funniest moment of the week was Cat’s phone call this morning as we were about to check out of the hotel.


“Is that Miss Evison?”


“No, I’ll just get her hold on” – “Hello?”


“Miss Evison, it’s Mr Michael for you”


“Is that first name or second name Michael?”


“Oh yes”


“Er, is Michael the first name or second name”


“Oh yes, I’ll connect you”


“Oh, ok, but will it cost me anything?”


“Ok”


“No, will it cost me anything? Do I need to pay you?”


“Oh yes, I see”


“No, do I need to pay? Do I need to give you money?”


“No it’s free, it’s free”


“Oh ok then”


“Oh yes, I see, I’ll connect you”


... Cat waits, the phone goes dead, she gets bored and hangs up, the phone rings again...


“Is that the room for Mr & Mrs Evison?”


“No, it’s Miss Evison”


“Oh, you’re not here with your partner Madam?”


“Erm, no”


“Ok then”... put’s phone down....


I guess that makes me the man of this relationship then...
 

 
Unfortunately they hadn't called us earlier in the week to offer us the honeymoon suite as we had hoped, but despite the crushing disappointment of this, we still managed to enjoy ourselves. 
 
Bali was beautiful, and I would love to go back, stocked with higher factor suncream.  I think, much as I loved it, we had a very sanitised version, and were quite isolated.  We couldn't even really walk to the shops, because the resort was so massive.  It suited us perfectly though, given we couldn't really go anywhere, and they had good TV - our favourite Asian channel, Star Movies, kept us supplied with more B-rate films than we could ever want, and we swam (mostly at night), and slept, watched TV and ate for a week, so we're nicely recharged.  We toyed with the idea of taking a tour of the island, but in the end decided it was a bit expensive, so took our time there for what we'd intended it - a relaxing beach holiday. 

 
Looking forward to getting back on the tourist trail in Singapore, and seeing some exciting things...